Johnny Go: Singer, Swinger, Humdinger (thehefner) wrote in um_yea_ok,
Johnny Go: Singer, Swinger, Humdinger

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Doctor Doom Goes to Washington

(I posted this in my own LJ some time back. Thought it would work as a first post into this community. Enjoy. Or not. As you like.)

HA! Doom has arrived in the pitiful capital of this puny nation! This city now belongs to DOOM! But before Doom overthrows this government, he will first venture to the nightclub known as Nation and there he shall meet up Galactus and Terrax the Terrible for drinks and maybe meet some fine honeys who shall be seduced by my sheer power and majesty! Now, onward! First, along Pennsylvania Ave, yes, Doom shall remember this road indeed for it shall come in handy later! Now, onto Independence Ave, and then to... wait, where the fuck is Independence? What do you mean, I'm already on it? How the fuck did that happen?! Wait, we're supposed to get on Maine Ave, right? So where is it? No, that's not right... argh! We've gone too far, go back! No, not that way, now we're on Whitehurst freeway! Turn around, worms, turn around! Ok, go back. No, the *other* back! Wait, there's no accursed street sign for Maine Ave! No, we've gone back and forth along this road five times now! No, turn around! Doom doesn't care if you can't, fools! Doom is your MONARCH and Doom demands you turn around NOW! No U-turns here, you say? DOOM SHITS ON YOUR NO-U-TURN SIGNS! Wait, how in the name of Dormammu's flaming testicles did we end up on Massachusetts Ave?! Bah! Not even the Beyonder could figure out these roads! Curse this accursed city and everyone in it! Doom shall return to Latveria and bomb it all into the Stone Age! Doom is displeased. Doom will have a cookie.

*takes cookie, brings it to the mouth of his metal mask* Kunk! Kunk!

... curse you, Richards.
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